I’m going to do something I’ve never done before, I’m going to post a question from this month’s Psych-O Analysis Newsletter. I’m doing this because I was besieged by the readers telling me to blog this for everyone’s benefit. Here goes…
Q: What do you think about strollers and dog bags for small dogs? I have a Peke and love taking her everywhere in her dog purse. I just love her little head peeking out of the purse. My friend’s dog was trained by you and she and I had a disagreement about Cin-Cin being carried in her purse when we go out. I think it’s just fine. She said I should get your opinion. Kimi W., NY
A: I’m going to do this. I know I shouldn’t. I know I will get into trouble, but I cannot help myself. Yep…here goes.
Honey, put the dog on the ground, throw out the purse, and drop the diminutive of your name. Grow up (regardless of your current age), let the dog be a dog and stop insisting it’s a fashion accessory.
To all you women out there with names such as, Lori, Lisa, Kimberly, Patti, Michelle, Cyndi, Tammi, Sherri, Jacquie, Stephie, or any derivation thereof, who in any manner emulate the following pictures, please…get help. Intervention programs may help you and your dog will be much happier.
You are not, you never were, nor will you ever BE the conspicuously rich air-heads you see here. Your dog cannot make you seem as if you are, or will be, a social power.
Look at the relative age of these “women”. They still carry pacifiers and haven’t developed breasts. They can’t think beyond themselves. LOOK at that dog. Does he LOOK HAPPY? If the twit in the picture was three years old you, as a sane and responsible adult, would tell her she was not to carry the dog around in that manner. Woman! Heed the advice! Don’t carry your dog!
I’m sorry, but the woman on the left does not look so much as if she cares for her dogs, so much as she resembles a nymphet in a porn movie ad for “Deidre Does Dachsies”.
You never know the looks that go on behind your back. Take my word for it, if you are over eight years old, don’t try to carry your dog.
Carrying your dog in a backpack does not mean you are active. It does not mean that you can bike or run faster than your dog as you are, somehow, an Olympic contender.
It simply means you are too lazy to walk the dog or teach it to jog next to your bike. It also means you are too self-absorbed to slow down and think about your dog. Which, in case you’ve missed the point I’m attempting to make, is what this entire issue is about.
Dogs are not colorblind and can see in pastels. However, that does not give you license to opt for bags, first and foremost, and definitely not bags of neon colors which are merely to call attention to the fact that you are carrying a dog.
Look at the faces of these dogs, they are NOT happy. Stop being so unaware of the misery you are causing.
The woman who did this to this dog should be placed in residential treatment. The dog’s eyes look as if he’s on crack.
Hyper, trapped, never exercised all to feed the ego of some frou-frous female. These are the women who ‘do’ dog parks, cell phones, and low-fat lattes—SIMULTANEOUSLY.
These are the dogs that are insufferable because of the hubris of their human.
Your dog is NOT a baby.
Your dog is NOT a toy.
Your dog is NOT a fashion accessory.
Your dog is NOT an inanimate object.
Your dog is NOT a sop for your fragile self-esteem.
So my advice?