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Owners are in Deep Doo-Doo

September 8th, 2011

“Are you suggesting madam that there exists a law compelling a gentleman to lay hold of canine bowel movements?”

“I’m suggesting that you pick the poop up.”
(From the movie “Kate & Leopold” 2001)

Long has the lawn called to the walked dog. Parks, commons, any wide expanse of green, it seems, sets off the signal of need in the dog. Most owners pick up, but a few never “doo”. This has led to a plethora of signs, some not very friendly.

But, as of now, dog owners are in deep doo-doo, let me tell you, because over at Newser is an article about the Timberwood Commons apartment complex in New Hampshire, which is now using DNA testing on dog waste to discover the culprits who refuse to pick up what their dogs leave. The complex manager is, in other words, becoming a Scatological Sleuth, a Doo-Doo Deputy, a Poop Penalizer, a Waste Warden, willing to take samples and name names.

Armed with a PooPrints kit, made by a company in Tennessee, there are approximately twenty properties in the U.S. that are determined to put a stop to all the sh*& happening around their apartments. ““It’s one of the coolest things I’ve ever done as a property manager,” says the head of another development.”

It is now a fact that no matter where you go in this world, your dog may come along, but he may not leave anything behind.

Warning Sign

From a general hygiene perspective this makes sense. None of us wish to be surprised
and assaulted by malodorous wafting upon entering our vehicles, only to discover we stepped in that-which-must-not-be-named.

If these signs are any indication, this is now, obviously, a problem across the globe. As you can see, Canada has approached the problem with humor in an attempt to coerce owners, who let their dogs dump-and-run, to fulfill their latrine duty. Being Canada, of course, they make the sign bi-lingual.

Canada Has Humor

The Chinese cut right to the heart of the matter and don’t mince words.

The Japanese, using a marketing ploy which has been well received, add graphic art reminiscent of “Hello, Kitty”, but more along the lines of “No, No, Doggy”.

My 'Not-So-Pretty, Doggy'

Israel utilizes the written word, as well as international graphics, in their clear attempt to mitigate the problem.

"No" in any language

Germany places their signs where they think they will be most readily spied:

The English, always polite, give you fair warning of the cost of your egregious disdain in failure to comply with the law and for ignoring your dog’s call-of-nature with this posting:

And, of course, when stated in French, doing poop patrol always sounds more elegant:

Non poopette

Then there are places that cover all known contingencies:

Clearly we are willing to go to all lengths, including invasion of privacy, in order to nab the culprits:

Voiding on Video

Had the kit been readily available, I doubt such a public display as this would have gone unpunished:

"Out" Field

So, please clean up after your dog. And remember, in the immortal words and picture offered to us by Jefferson County, Colorado:

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